CHAOS

I have lived in chaos for over a decade, possibly longer. But who’s counting?

My nervous system, that’s who. I no longer recognize who I used to be. Sound familiar?

Post- Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) can develop over time in parents of children with Developmental Trauma and other similar disorders. Our children need more time, more energy and more patience than most parents could even begin to imagine. Imagine running out of professionals to help your child and family. Your situation is too “complex” or “out of my scope”. As a parent, it' was not with in my scope either, but walking away was not an option for me, although I offer no shame or guilt to parents who have had to walk that road. We came close many times.

Sometimes you just have to keep going moment by moment and turning over rocks so to speak until you find the one that helps. At least for a little while, there is often a disconnect here until they decide your child isn’t ready, or isn’t the right fit for that program. So you keep on trucking every single damn day and it’s okay to say this is dang exhausting.

You don’t love your child any less for stopping for a minute to listen to your own needs. It’s important and so very crucial to keep your needs on the front burner, because in this situation if you don’t purposely plan self-care it is very unlikely to happen. You will never feel like you love3 them enough, help them enough or do enogh. But I promise you, it’s enough. All your child really needs is you healthy, regulated and in the moment with them.

We only have so many moments and that is enough.